today is my third day of bummin around. i had a lot of things in mind: things to do, people to see. but theres this one thing ive been wanting to do. to actualize the early christmas/bday gift for engr. the idea started one lazy night while i was trying to organize my limited dvd collections (tv series here, films there, porns underthebed). i dont know why whenever i see any julia roberts cd im always tempted to feed it on the player and play-away. Closer (julia r and natalie p) yeah yeah. who am i kidding? maybe the urge to play it is really because i wanted to check natalie p out. she's competition. engr is, i think, determined to marry her. the film was good. i remember watchin it first time with marco, if my memory didnt fail me marco had a lot of things to say about it and as what i usually do, i nodded and agreed. the one scene where natalie is gawkin at her own sad image gave me the idea of what to give engr as a present. the movie ended. it felt like theres this lump on my chest i cannot shake off. but i just slept on it.
monday, i went to a friends shop and told him about the idea and if he could help. of course he said yes, he's going to give me a discount (was hoping it will be free). two days after i got hold of the present and i was pleased (oops, blasphemy). i brought it to work and left it there, thought there will be less meaning to the present if i give it weeks early. but knowing me, too excited to make someone feel special, i blabbed about the present to engr. i was hoping he'd also get excited but after a few lines after i mentioned the present, i lost him online, i just stared at his online icon fighting the urge to open up another topic. so there, he knows about the present, i might as well send it already.
thursday, i went to a couple of courier outlets here. theres JRS who turned me down because, they cant ship anything fragile. LBC would take the package granting i would have to get the thing crated. yeah, theres the universe again conspiring against me. downhearted, i sent a message to a friend "san ka na? i need help". she agreed to meet me and as i wait for her and binge on what tree garden has to offer i seriously thought of keepin the present and give it to him personally if i still have a chance. but again, theres no such things as the universe conspiring against ryan... may bukas pa...
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